[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PltMz1gQBJM[/youtube]

CRRAAAZZZYYY!  I’ve seen the world glow before.  A bright moonlit night with snow all around makes for a stunning BRIGHT night.  But glowing red, orange and sometimes blood orange?  Today was a first.  Definitely a wow!

Ok so I’ve come to realize that online communities and our identities within online communities are complicated topics!!!  There’s no way we could really have a full blown conversation about it in only 200 words per pop.  But hey – it’s the effort that counts right?  :)  Thanks to the commentors (scoMan, dave, ebonyJewel and MattyMatt) for commenting!!!  It’s always great to hear others’ insight!!

And for those of you who I have no doubt WANTED to comment deep down in your heart (which is everyone else i.e MOM, TIM, ALEXIS, SCOTT and all of my other bloggy friends) thank you ALSO because life is more fun with family and bloggy friends!!!   :)  )  Oh and it’s not too late to throw in your 2 cents because I’ve decided to write my final paper in a different class on this topic.  :)

Down to bizness.

ONLINE COMMUNITIES – You and Me are a CommuniTY – part #5 – wrap up.

(btw anyone notice that I did part NUMBER 5 or part NUMBER 4? LOL I did it just to be silly.  I am fully aware, thank you, that it SHOULD be part 5 or just #5. hee hee)

I’ve decided that I am fascinated by this topic.  100%.  Our world is becoming more and more digital every day.  We move to online communities more and more every day.  Our selves, our identities, and our culture are all being impacted by this change.  And though I suppose our identities, cultures and selves always change, I think it’s important to recognize the significance of online avatars/identities and how this increase in control over image may affect our core definitions.

I took this opportunity to round up some (only 3 because most of them were dumb) quotes on self image.

1“The ”self-image” is the key to human personality and human behavior. Change the self image and you change the personality and the behavior.” 2“Our self image, strongly held, essentially determines what we become”

Maxwell Maltz quotes (US plastic surgeon, motivational author, and creator of the Psycho-Cybernetics, 1927-2003)

3“If you wake up at a different time, in a different place, could you wake up as a different person?”

Chuck Palahniuk quotes (American freelance Journalist, Satirist and Novelist. b.1961)

I suppose one interesting thing about networks and identities is they change with time.  As I meet and become connected with more people, my network grows.  As my connections meet and become connected with more people, my network grows.  As my identity is tried and tested with time, it evolves and takes stronger shape.  I don’t believe we can STOP a network or an identity.  We may take on new layers, new directions and new flavors, but the network around us and our identity (regardless of how many we choose to have) all overlap a bit with each other.  We can’t go backward – only forward.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=urNyg1ftMIU[/youtube]

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UCgHS0TwIA8[/youtube]

We left off yesterday thinking about how many identities we have and how our online identities may differ from our “real life” selves.  I confessed that years ago I presented my identity on mySpace differently than on Facebook.  I was the same person – but my online identities differed.  ScoMan made a good point about how our identities change according to context.  Dave philosophized that our TRUE identity is found somewhere between our dreams (identities we wish we could try out – or do try out in the online world) and our fears (the identity we present to the actual world – held back by fear or societal pressure.)

Soo… let’s get on with it.  200 words or less.  :)  Let’s talk AVATARS!!!  :)

(First you should PROLLY for fun – turn a picture of yourself into an avatar-ish pic at BeFunky.com – why? because it’s FUN! :)

Dr. Suler from Self Help Magazine explains,

“The basic assumption of a psychotherapy using avatars is that all of the personae created in the virtual scenario are the various manifestations of the person’s psyche.”

DO YOU AGREE??  Is the picture you choose to use as an avatar a manifestation of your psyche?  I think it might!!  We choose the clothes we want to wear and how we present ourselves.  It says something about us.  How is choosing how we present ourselves online be any different?

This begs the question – if the avatar we choose is an alter ego then is it our alter ego interacting in the network or online community? For example if Jane is a thin, elderly woman but her avatar in her online community is a fat man – is it the fat man or thin Jane engaging in the network??  And if our avatar becomes besties within a social network with the fat man, are we really only networked with thin Jane?  Because we THOUGHT we were besties with a fat man!!

This next clip is an example of how online identities can be so very, very different than real life.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ge2FHDf_L78[/youtube]

Alright – that’s enough for this part!!  We’ll conclude tomorrow!!  :)

In the last post we considered (or rather I suggested we consider) how online communities play into our sense of identity and self.  Princess Pointful, once (and probably still) a well known blogger who received several SUPER BLOG awards (by 20sb) and has been featured in print blogs, is a great case of how an online identity can significantly impact a “physical” identity.  Back in May she announced she was going to take a break from blogging and then followed up with comments discussing how different her life was now that she wasn’t blogging as regularly.  At one point she asked her readers if she should give up or continue and quite literally discussed that her ego has been deflated a bit (though it appears she has taken that post down) and I wondered if you have to ask the question, well … maybe that’s your answer??

The online world has meaning.  It contributes to our sense of worth, connection, self esteem, etc.   But just as in the world outside of the internet, when we use connections with others as our point of personal validation we open ourselves to the possibility of losing it all with one false rumor, one bad post, or just losing our edge period.  Having a balanced life between online and social engagements is one way to prevent loss of self worth due to decreased online activity.  Though with that said, just like in the social world, if one finds they no longer fit within one clique or group, there are many other groups for which one may seek acceptance.  And in an online world there are no geographical boundaries preventing one from finding the group to which they belong.

Next up –  now that we’ve seen an example of an “expert” in the online community, we’ll look at experts in sociology and see what they have to say.

For my Network Society class I am to have a 5 part series/discussion on something cool (i.e. my choice) as long as it’s academically relevant to my class.  I’m also supposed to make it more formal than a ‘normal’ blog post (who defines normal?) and I would GUESS that means I should use BIG words.  I sure hope that words in capital letters count as BIG!!!  (hee hee)  Thankfully for YOU each of the parts only has to be about 200 words.  That’s like NOTHING!  Sooooo…. (does it count as big if it has eeeexxxxtttrrrraaa letters?) here is my first part – 200 words on online communities.  I hope with my WHOLE HEART you choose to participate (comment.)  :)

Online Communities

Never in my life did I realize how much my identity was tied to my culture and community until I moved out of my community.  Living in the heart of one of the chirpiest cities in the United States, full of people who don’t drink, smoke, do drugs, or watch dirty movies, and who wave and smile at everyone who drives into the neighborhood, I was in for a bit of culture shock when I moved to the busy city life of Sydney, Australia.

Who are my neighbors?  Heaven knows I have no clue!  Who was the dude yelling at his alleged crazy girlfriend down the street?  Heaven knows I’m OK that I don’t know!  And umm, excuse me, WHY did you think it was OK to pat my behind while I was walking down the street you crazy stranger?  No, actually – don’t answer that – in fact let’s both forget you exist. (snap!)

Community and culture play a huge role in the way we see and define the world and our surroundings.  It helps us assess meaning and value.  It contributes to our filters and our level of comfort.  And HOW we define our relationship with our community and culture (whether we accept or reject it) contributes to our personal identity.

In a new world full of online communities, how do these digital cultures affect our daily lives?  How much of our identity is wrapped up in digital cultures and online communities?

NEXT POST – I’ll bring in what a few of the “experts” have to say about it – but until then – I’d LOVE to hear what you have to say.  :)  :)  :)

Hmm … I think a bullet point list ought to do.  YAY!!!  a LIST!!!  Wahoo!!!

What does this picture say about me??

1. I love ketchup
2. I don’t just LOVE ketchup but I totally <3 HEART <3 it TOO!!!  YAY!!!
3. Engineering CATASTROPHES kinda sorta bug me – kinda sorta in the way that I actually bother to take a picture of the catastrophe to post on my blog.  HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO WASH MY HANDS IN WARM WATER WHEN MY ONLY OPTIONS ARE BURNING HOT AND ICY COLD???  And no it doesn’t work to try and lightning fast swing back and forth between the two.  And even though the cold does feel pretty ok after SCORCHING your hand on BURNING HOT WATER – it doesn’t make it ok.
4. I attend the University of Sydney where these sinks are found.
5. I’m on pain pills for my back.  What? you couldn’t tell that from the picture?  OOOHHH.  Well now – look again dear friend and you MAY just see that I got ON THE WRONG TRAIN today for the first time EVER because I’m  a little YAYHAPPYDAY-DOTOODOOO space cadet.  I discovered my error when I landed in a town I couldn’t pronounce in an area I couldn’t pronounce next to a guy whose name I SURELY couldn’t pronounce.

And the best part??  The pills don’t even really work!  And thanks to the Dr. I went from a 6 on the Frowny Face scale to a whopping 8.8!!!  He said “Can you move your head like this?” and then proceeded to move my head BEFORE I COULD REACT and then YOWSERS!!  8.8 on the Frowny Scale.  The pill brought me back down to an 8 but I’d say a -0.8 reduction does NOT speak highly of the medicine.

Nighty night!!

oh and p.s. #3 has a new GF and – well – you ALL know what I won’t say right about now.  But what I WILL say is that they look really cute together!!  :)  And it appears those french fries that #3 told me I wasn’t allowed to eat because he was afraid I’d PORK OUT have landed smack dab on his hips while all that extra alkeehall he drinks now that his partner drinks with him has landed squarely (or should I say roundly?) on his belly.  HAHAHA! Karma’s a be-otch!

SNAP! I know I shouldn’t point fingers while I’m eating a bag of M&Ms – but seriously – you try being a space cadet while having EIGHT degrees of frown all up in your neck.

Violent Femmes – Blister in the Sun

omgosh – just KIDDING??  What is that?? it’s a foreign language!!  Let’s try this one instead …

First I had an assignment due – a big one.  That was due 2 weeks ago.  I still haven’t handed it in.  Things haven’t been going as smoothly as hoped.

Day 20, 21 & 22- when I was still optimistic about my essay

Day 23 and 24 – Remember how I decided no more kissing North Sydney because HE IS A COMMITMENTPHOBE who FREAKS OUT every time HE kisses me!?!?  Yeah – that didn’t last long.  And then I went to my international adviser and she told me that she struggling to try and work with me because I’m smarter than her and my life is very complicated.  Gee – that’s encouraging. (insert glare.)

Day 25 and 26 -  I think it was about THIS point in my life when I discovered North Sydney didn’t remember ANYTHING about our meeting, his “stalk you later” phone calls and our very brief romance a year ago.  I very bluntly called this to his attention. :)  He tried to kiss and make up – I rolled my eyes and laughed.  Then I tried to do my essay and fell asleep over and over again.  Oh and I discovered I can tell the difference between fresh and not-as-fresh M&Ms. oh yes.

Day 27 – I went and met with the adviser again and this time she was more encouraging.  We determined that I’m having issues with essay writing because of my first semester as a graduate student when I had a super nasty teacher who used her dislike of my nationality to influence the marks she gave me.  As a straight 95% and above student my whole life – I lost all confidence in my ability to be a student after I received her grades and this lack of confidence is a detriment to my current studies.  :(  We agreed that discrimination and racism are out of my control and I need to try and move forward.  I decided to study in the park under the bright and beautiful sun.

Day 28 -  I actually went to class – instead of staying home sick like I did the rest of the week.  Class was REALLY good – I’m in the process of animating a girl on a swing set.  It’s a lot of fun and I can do it for hours and hours without getting bored.  A BIG relief from essay writing.

Day 29 and 30 – I’ve had insomnia like no other the past couple of weeks.  “Bones” the television series has become my nightly insomnia treatment.  It also makes for great dreams.  I’ve never been a better crime fighter/super hero/pretend anthropologist in my life. :) lol.

Day 31 – One month down – 12 more to go.

It means “I love you” in sign language.  I might have accidentally kind of said something that would indicate the possibility that I COULD be in love with North Sydney.  I didn’t mean to!!  It slipped out!!!

He said- “You need to have kids.  You will be a great mom.”  (a nice compliment bcuz he has a child.)

I said – “Yeah but finding the right guy is going to be next to impossible.  I think I’ll just settle with my dogs – they’re like my kids.”

He laughed and said, “You’re getting close.  If you mix CC+4 with -3 you’d almost get the perfect man for you.”

I said, “Yeah but I’m never going to meet someone who is perfect and there isn’t going to be a guy out there who is a cross between all the good of CC+4 and all the good of -3.”

He said, “You never know…”

I said, “What I really need is just to find the American version of you – then I’d be set.”

I CAN’T BELIEVE I SAID THAT!!!

I told my flatmate that I couldn’t believe I let that one slip out!!!  North Sydney gets scared off every time he kisses me – and then I tell him he’s like the perfect guy for me??  My flatmate said, “Yeah but do you feel that way?”  I said – “Yes.”  And my flatmate said, “Well then you told the truth.  You shouldn’t be worried about it.”

He’s right.  I told the truth.  And fortunately for me – North Sydney DIDN’T freak out – he just took it as a compliment – and things are the same as always.  :)

TODAY’s horoscope

You may become less confident as the day wears on, especially if you must show up at a big social event. But if you are able to steal away for a while, then you can emerge from your mini-retreat revitalized and ready to go back out for another round of battles with the status quo. Don’t be afraid of your own power, even if you think it’s wiser to wait for the right time to act.

Annnddd yahoo.com’s said something about taking time for myself and writing a list of “to dos”….

LESS CONFIDENT

I was pretty confident about life this morning but as luck would have it (or more likely as my subconscious would have it because I had already read the above horoscope) I DID lose confidence in myself as the day wore on.  WHAT??  Why would I ever do a thing like that?

Prolly because I realized I’m in some suck classes, the camera adds 10 lbs, I stuttered on TV today and I ran into TWO professors who gave me the pity look because they know about my stupid special consideration and swine flu last semester.

Yeah – that could be why.

Some ME Time

I was kind of excited that my horoscope encouraged a little ME time today but I wasn’t sure how I was going to fit it in – I had a full schedule today!!  After my first class I decided to skip class #2 because it sucks and I’m going to change it for a different one anyway … and I had a choice:

BUS OR WALK??

WALK of course!!  Why?  Because walking is ME time!!  YAY!!!  So I walked from Uni to Central and did some thinking – lots of thinking.  Mostly about the pavement, the cars driving by, the hotties in business suits – but ALSO about Uni, my list of things to do – and ok – that was about all.  Unless you count trying to decide whether or not to text/sms No. Syd and tell him about my day’s adventures as thinking – if you do? well then I thought about that a lot too.

I decided to text him – and got no reply.  And not that I’m getting ready to throw in the towel or anything but seriously – EVERY TIME I DECIDE I LIKE A GUY IT ENDS WITHIN LIKE A WEEK.  So I wouldn’t be terribly surprised if the Love Gods out there put a jinx on this whole thing – aw well.  Time will tell.

No backing out now!!

Even if things don’t work with No. Syd guess what?  I meant what I said about the taking a chance thing – no more negative nancy from me about relationships.  I am ready to put myself on the line – it may take a REALLY LONG time before I find someone that I want to commit to – it may take a REALLY LONG time before I start dating again … but I’m not going to be actively AGAINST it like I was.  In fact! I even replied to Adorable Boy’s (he was the reason I went on the cruise where I met CC+4) email today.  He wants to come visit.  I told him that’d be great.  And you know what will happen if Adorable Boy comes out to visit?  hee hee.  SPARKS WILL FLY!  :)

I HATE TOMORROW’s HOROSCOPE

I just want everyone to know that I already hate tomorrow’s horoscope.  WHY??  Because it is going to require super extra effort on my part to make it come true.  The task??  Find meaning in the mundane things you do.  And after the 2 page long TO DO list I made today of MUNDANE SUCK THINGS TO DO!!! Tomorrow is DEFINITELY going to be a challenge.

But the joy is in the challenge right??  :)

Yeah so remember all of those parties and plans I had this past weekend?  No?  Oh wait that’s right – I never got to blog about them OR go to them because I had the SWINE FLU!  grr.  extra grrr.

ANYWAY – I had a couple assignments due yesterday and so guess what?  I did them.  yay!  Happy days for Daisy!

EXCEPT

I was totally drugged up on flu medicine when I wrote them.  Want to know why this is a problem?  Because I wrote the following in my paper:

Someone else could read this conversation and think that Marie has a crush on Sharon and is being overly strict with her in order to prevent the lesbian soap opera gossip around the office.

It gets better.  I also wrote this:

Sharon could be upset for a multitude of reasons. If we throw out the lesbian soap opera option and only look at the surface, we see that Sharon’s needs and wants are not being heard.

And the sentence that makes my paper the coolest druggy paper ever???

Depending on the reality of proposed behind closed doors antics, there could be a lot of fiery gender battles interwoven in this conversation.

Let’s repeat this one because it’s THAT GOOD:

Depending on the reality of proposed behind closed doors antics, there could be a lot of fiery gender battles interwoven in this conversation.

It’s ok though – I saved the paper with this fantastic conclusion:

Sharon, who could potentially have a crush on her manager Marie, may also be a man hater. If this is the case she would be especially furious that her partner and boss was putting her career on the back burner for a guy. Or if Sharon suspects there is a relationship between Marie and John, she may believe that she is being sexually harassed. Eitherway, Marie was not an effective team-manager when she allowed John to take control of the situation.

Yep – THAT’s what happens when you write a paper while drugged up on flu medicine.

Take a lesson from my mistakes and don’t try this one at home.

Next up – a little side work for a ~friend~? And NO – not like THAT.  It was just some simple admin stuff.  And then he took me to dinner and we talked for hours and then he took me home (and NO – not like THAT) and then he gave me a lingering kiss which I don’t want to read into … but also wouldn’t mind reading into.  But probably shouldn’t – it’s complicated.

Got home and had this email waiting – don’t mind that my ENGLISH uni teacher SPELLED CANCELED WRONG!!! Dude for real?  She’s an ENGLISH TEACHER!!!!  Ever heard of SPELL CHECK??

Dear All,

Please note that the strike planned for next Tuesday has been cancelled.  This means that classes will be on as usual next Tuesday.

I apologise for the inconvenience.

Best wishes and see you all next week.

Umm – wow.  Alrighty then.

Dose Duex of Daisy’s Dad’s 500lb Pumpkin Quest

Day 4 -  “Oh happy day.  I saw a root starting to come out of a seed.  A little more probing and I found 3 more seeds that had germinated.”

Day 5 – “Okay, I couldn’t wait.  I transplanted one or two plants into their new home, a 1″ x 2″ pony pack (4 compartments per container.)   Prodding of the soil tells me that many of the seeds have germinated.  (What have I done?  How will I find home for all of these sleeping giants?) ~No kidding dad!  You planted ONE HUNDRED!!~ The first leaves are just starting to emerge from within the seed’s outer shell.  It’s amazing how fast they are growing.  Within a couple of days they will be ten times the size of the seed they once were.  What will tomorrow bring?”

OMGOSH – what WILL tomorrow bring?  If this keeps up I won’t be surprised if we hear next that my dad’s pumpkins have turned his house into the little shop of horrors and I’m going to have to fly home with an ax and save my parents from man-eating jack-o-lanterns.  What you don’t think I’m tough enough to wield an ax to man-eating jack-o-lanterns?  Think again doubty-pants.  It’s called ADRENALINE.  And I’m pretty sure I’d have a bit of it. 

Nighty night! xoxo~Daisy

Well one night when the owner of said bed was tossing and turning because she couldn’t sleep, it came alive.  Oh yes.  ALIVE.  You see, normal, non-alive lamps don’t move.  But ALIVE lamps sprout magical legs and terrible senses of humor.  (No really you should hear the jokes they tell – not funny!)

At about 4:45am when all was quiet in the world and the bats and birds outside the lamp’s window hadn’t started SQUAWKING OUT OF CONTROL YET the lamp thought it would be funny to play a prank on the owner of the bed.  And yes I said bats.  They sound like cats fighting to the death – oh the joy.

Anywho – The lamp loved JUMPING into the flannel sheets because they’re PRETTY and the cherry blossoms really accentuate the magenta craptastic plastic – but because the owner was scared someone would notice her magical lamp had legs and take it away and dissect it like they did the ginormous squid in Wellington, NZ at the Te Papas Museum (poor ginormous squid)  –  the lamp agreed it would ONLY nose dive onto the bed when the owner of said bed was her ungraceful self and bumped the bed thereby making it APPEAR as if it were the owner’s fault the lamp “fell.”  Though YOU AND I know it didn’t fall, it JUMPED. 

Ok so that was a the-longest-sentence-EVAH and now let’s get back on track.  4:45am – quiet.  Owner of bed is sleeping.

Oopsie! The lamp – who WILL be donated for scientific research and subsequent dissection if it ever pulls this prank again – JUMPED from its resting place and LANDED ON MY FACE.  I mean – oops – the OWNER OF SAID BED’S FACE.  Not head – FACE.  Eyebrow bone to be exact. So not funny at 4:45am.

OH and then I went to school and I looked like death and the teacher said, “How are you feeling?” and I told her the truth which was that I’m SICK because I have a cold and can barely eat because my stomach feels like it does about an hour or so after you’ve discovered you’ve had bad sushi and all you want to do is vomit so you’ll feel better – OMGOSH TMI – (ok I ACTUALLY just told her I’m sick) and she asked if I’ve been to Mexico recently – and I assured her I do not have the swine flu but she said it would be better for everyone if I went home anyway.  So I did.