The Green Tawking Hippo Academy

It’s not like I’ve never been to school before.  it’s just…  Well, when did hippos start wearing polka dot bikinis?

Maybe the name of the school should have given it away. Green Tawking Hippo Academy for Women. But it sounded so cool! For a budding environmentalist, it seemed perfect! What could be better than a school located in the heart of Tawking Canyon , on the banks of the Green River , and named after an endangered species? Can we say “nothing?”

Oh if only it were that simple and if only Hippos knew how to spell. Even though the school WAS in the middle of Tawking Canyon , the school wasn’t named after it. In fact, it wasn’t named after the Green River either. The founders of the school MEANT to name the school Green Talking Hippo Academy after all of the rich, successful Hippos who work there and can talk. But although these hippos have mastered speaking, they have yet to learn to spell. So yeah -  tawking hippos – talking hippos. Talk about a trip!

It wouldn’t really have been so bad to learn from the hippos. They are very unusual peop… umm … they are very unusual mammals. But the hippos weren’t interested in teaching about their ways. Nope. They were more interested in other things; though those other things did APPEAR to be of an environmental nature in the course catalog.

First Period – Blossoming Flowers. “Oh nooooooo, Ms. Nooncy,” the instructing hippo, wearing a burgundy mini skirt and a black tube top, shouted to a fellow classmate. “Grey is the WORST color for you to wear. It blends right into your skin. You must stand out! Be noticed. No wall flowers in my class. We are blossoming flowers! Beautiful! Bold! B… AHH! Ms. Pugmore, a corset is NOT going to help you hold your tummy in – and goodness gracious, why would you want to? We’re hippos – we’re fat – it is our defining feature and we must not try and hide it. Love the skin you’re in Ms. Pugmore. Love it.”

Second Period – Don’t Hunt. The instructor of this class wore the most ridiculous blond wig. It was fantastic! “First things first class.” She said as she paced back and forth in front of the class, “You are all Big, Beautiful, and Bold Hippos.” Long pause. “Now, I want you all to take a deep breath and feel the air cleanse your body, nourishing your beauty. Ok. Down to the important stuff. It is imperative that you, as female Hippos, do NOT, I repeat, do NOT hunt for male hippos. We are NOT rhinoceroses. We are Hippopotamuses and we do not hunt or chase our men like THEY do. Our men chase after us and if they’re LUCKY we may pay them some attention. But as a side note I don’t blame the Rhino men from running away from their women – I mean come on – just look at them! I’d run away from MYSELF if I looked like that.”

Third Period – The Study of Mother Earth. This one HAD to be an environmental class right? A petite hippo, if there is such a thing, stood up in front of the class. “Mother Earth has given us amazing gifts. The gift of water and the gift of earth. If we mix these gifts together we create the gift of beauty. Today we will be learning about mud baths, mud masks and the power we have to be beautiful.”

You know what? Hippos are a little intimidating all on their own. But having to hide behind a rock to avoid being trampled by a herd of hippos racing to the banks of the Green River for a mud bath is down right scary.

Lunch

Fourth Period – Tree Huggers 101 – “And one and two and three and four…” The teacher stopped her squats to welcome the class. “Hello everyone. Go ahead and take your place by a tree stump and rip it out of the ground like this. Ok good. Except you over there – honey I think a tree is too big for you. Why don’t you sit this one out?” No problems there! The rest of the class ripped out their stumps and placed them firmly between their teeth in the proper “hugging” manner. I shook my head and sighed as they did squats, while “hugging” their trees. Apparently it improves balance as well as muscle tone in Hippos. Go figure.

Fifth Period – Meteorology. Everyone raced to the changing rooms after fourth period to change into their bikinis. Hmm … meteorology and bikinis? And then everyone rushed to fifth period – which was being held at the sandy nook along the southern end of the Green River . “Alright class – settle down,” the instructor announced. “Today we learn about how the sun darkens our skin and makes it even MORE beautiful. Find a beach towel, lie down and let the sun soak into your skin. I’ll remind you in a half hour to flip to your other side. I hope everyone remembered to bring their unique bathing suit shapes because you will adore the patterns they leave on your skin later.” Tan lines are adorable? When clothing is optional and you are hippo… seemingly they are.

Not long after everyone had settled in, each covering four beach towels a piece, the principal arrived. After welcoming all the lovely new students she asked “Would the non-hippo please escort me to my office?”

Her office was close by and once she was settled into her snakeskin chair she apologized for a grave misunderstanding. “This is the Green “Tawking” Hippo Academy for Women as you well know, and although you are a woman… you are not a hippo and the school is for talking Hippos only. My sincerest apologies for the misunderstanding.” She went on, “It’s just that dear … when we saw your name – So Hippo – we just knew you had to be one of us. Who else would name their child So Hippo?  hahaha!  Anyway you’re dismissed.”

Walking out the door I muttered back to her, “It’s Sohi … Poe. The name is Sohi … Poe… NOT so hippo.” Not that the correction really mattered. It may as well be So Hippo to a green “tawking” hippopotamus.

Ugh.

Anyway – back to the one sided convo – I’m good at these….

North Sydney got a similar email.  And no – I’m not bitter AT ALL!  nope nope nope – I’m in a FABULOUS mood.  hmphf!!

Hmm … I think a bullet point list ought to do.  YAY!!!  a LIST!!!  Wahoo!!!

What does this picture say about me??

1. I love ketchup
2. I don’t just LOVE ketchup but I totally <3 HEART <3 it TOO!!!  YAY!!!
3. Engineering CATASTROPHES kinda sorta bug me – kinda sorta in the way that I actually bother to take a picture of the catastrophe to post on my blog.  HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO WASH MY HANDS IN WARM WATER WHEN MY ONLY OPTIONS ARE BURNING HOT AND ICY COLD???  And no it doesn’t work to try and lightning fast swing back and forth between the two.  And even though the cold does feel pretty ok after SCORCHING your hand on BURNING HOT WATER – it doesn’t make it ok.
4. I attend the University of Sydney where these sinks are found.
5. I’m on pain pills for my back.  What? you couldn’t tell that from the picture?  OOOHHH.  Well now – look again dear friend and you MAY just see that I got ON THE WRONG TRAIN today for the first time EVER because I’m  a little YAYHAPPYDAY-DOTOODOOO space cadet.  I discovered my error when I landed in a town I couldn’t pronounce in an area I couldn’t pronounce next to a guy whose name I SURELY couldn’t pronounce.

And the best part??  The pills don’t even really work!  And thanks to the Dr. I went from a 6 on the Frowny Face scale to a whopping 8.8!!!  He said “Can you move your head like this?” and then proceeded to move my head BEFORE I COULD REACT and then YOWSERS!!  8.8 on the Frowny Scale.  The pill brought me back down to an 8 but I’d say a -0.8 reduction does NOT speak highly of the medicine.

Nighty night!!

oh and p.s. #3 has a new GF and – well – you ALL know what I won’t say right about now.  But what I WILL say is that they look really cute together!!  :)  And it appears those french fries that #3 told me I wasn’t allowed to eat because he was afraid I’d PORK OUT have landed smack dab on his hips while all that extra alkeehall he drinks now that his partner drinks with him has landed squarely (or should I say roundly?) on his belly.  HAHAHA! Karma’s a be-otch!

SNAP! I know I shouldn’t point fingers while I’m eating a bag of M&Ms – but seriously – you try being a space cadet while having EIGHT degrees of frown all up in your neck.

Violent Femmes – Blister in the Sun

omgosh – just KIDDING??  What is that?? it’s a foreign language!!  Let’s try this one instead …

First I had an assignment due – a big one.  That was due 2 weeks ago.  I still haven’t handed it in.  Things haven’t been going as smoothly as hoped.

Day 20, 21 & 22- when I was still optimistic about my essay

Day 23 and 24 – Remember how I decided no more kissing North Sydney because HE IS A COMMITMENTPHOBE who FREAKS OUT every time HE kisses me!?!?  Yeah – that didn’t last long.  And then I went to my international adviser and she told me that she struggling to try and work with me because I’m smarter than her and my life is very complicated.  Gee – that’s encouraging. (insert glare.)

Day 25 and 26 -  I think it was about THIS point in my life when I discovered North Sydney didn’t remember ANYTHING about our meeting, his “stalk you later” phone calls and our very brief romance a year ago.  I very bluntly called this to his attention. :)  He tried to kiss and make up – I rolled my eyes and laughed.  Then I tried to do my essay and fell asleep over and over again.  Oh and I discovered I can tell the difference between fresh and not-as-fresh M&Ms. oh yes.

Day 27 – I went and met with the adviser again and this time she was more encouraging.  We determined that I’m having issues with essay writing because of my first semester as a graduate student when I had a super nasty teacher who used her dislike of my nationality to influence the marks she gave me.  As a straight 95% and above student my whole life – I lost all confidence in my ability to be a student after I received her grades and this lack of confidence is a detriment to my current studies.  :(  We agreed that discrimination and racism are out of my control and I need to try and move forward.  I decided to study in the park under the bright and beautiful sun.

Day 28 -  I actually went to class – instead of staying home sick like I did the rest of the week.  Class was REALLY good – I’m in the process of animating a girl on a swing set.  It’s a lot of fun and I can do it for hours and hours without getting bored.  A BIG relief from essay writing.

Day 29 and 30 – I’ve had insomnia like no other the past couple of weeks.  “Bones” the television series has become my nightly insomnia treatment.  It also makes for great dreams.  I’ve never been a better crime fighter/super hero/pretend anthropologist in my life. :) lol.

Day 31 – One month down – 12 more to go.

It means “I love you” in sign language.  I might have accidentally kind of said something that would indicate the possibility that I COULD be in love with North Sydney.  I didn’t mean to!!  It slipped out!!!

He said- “You need to have kids.  You will be a great mom.”  (a nice compliment bcuz he has a child.)

I said – “Yeah but finding the right guy is going to be next to impossible.  I think I’ll just settle with my dogs – they’re like my kids.”

He laughed and said, “You’re getting close.  If you mix CC+4 with -3 you’d almost get the perfect man for you.”

I said, “Yeah but I’m never going to meet someone who is perfect and there isn’t going to be a guy out there who is a cross between all the good of CC+4 and all the good of -3.”

He said, “You never know…”

I said, “What I really need is just to find the American version of you – then I’d be set.”

I CAN’T BELIEVE I SAID THAT!!!

I told my flatmate that I couldn’t believe I let that one slip out!!!  North Sydney gets scared off every time he kisses me – and then I tell him he’s like the perfect guy for me??  My flatmate said, “Yeah but do you feel that way?”  I said – “Yes.”  And my flatmate said, “Well then you told the truth.  You shouldn’t be worried about it.”

He’s right.  I told the truth.  And fortunately for me – North Sydney DIDN’T freak out – he just took it as a compliment – and things are the same as always.  :)

WHAT DOES THIS MEAN FOR YOU?? *big smiley face*

It means I’m going to give you a debriefing on CC+4, #3 and that new Jordin Spark’s craptastic song that I downloaded because well – LOVE IS A BATTLEFIELD – oh and I’m also going to explain why I am at war.

THAT’S RIGHT!  I’m AT WAR!!! … or at least my heart is …

LOVE IS A BATTLEFIELD

The song says “Don’t try to explain your mind I know what’s happening here.  One minute it’s love and suddenly it’s like the battlefield.  … I never meant to start a war.”

I’m trying to decide how to make this long story short – ah ha!  OUTLINE!!!

1. #3 calls and quizzes me on my “sportiness”
2. I wonder why the BLEEP he’s telling me he wants to get me into the gym
3. #3 confesses he thinks I’m wonderful
4. I say, “Yeah except you think I’m fat.”
5. #3 FREAKS OUT!!  He just wanted to spend quality time with me
6. I think “oopsie!”
7. #3 decides we don’t understand each other and wants to get to know the “real me”
8. #3 tries to upset me
9. I get upset
10. #3 drops the L bomb

#3 DROPS THE L BOMB!!!!!!

And then I say, “What?  No I don’t think so.  You can’t drop that on me right now while you’re PURPOSEFULLY TRYING TO MAKE ME UPSET!!”

He blah blah blahs some more and his phone dies.  And I’m left bewildered.

And then I went boating and well – see for yourself.  Me w/CC+4.

A picture speaks a thousand words.  And this pic in color – well – it speaks volumes.  Volumes and volumes.  It’s a great picture but I can’t go down this road again.  It hurt too much last time. He crushed me when suddenly stopped logging onto skype, stopped responding to emails – he deserted me.  And yet the feelings were instantly rekindled when I got home … but I don’t work that way.

I CAN’T TURN MY HEART OFF AND ON LIKE THAT!!!  And seeing him again … I can’t … I can’t.  I’m slipping – I have feelings for him.  But …

I can’t.  I really really can’t.  My heart can’t take it.  Not now – not when I’m supposed to leave in a week.  Not when #3 is dropping the L bomb on me.  Not when – well – not now.

My life is in Syndey now right?  I live there.  It’s where I’m supposed to be.

right ?

And I REALLY like #3.

So CC+4 – well … maybe I need to let him go.  Figuratively of course.  I need to tell my heart to let him go.  I need to focus on what’s REAL. And although my feelings for him are most definitely real – CC+4 has not done anything to lead me to believe he has any intentions for long term.  And if I can fully let him go – my heart will have no strings holding it back from #3.

I guess that settles things.  I have feelings for #3.  I have feelings for CC+4.  #3 has feelings for me.  CC+4 – ??  #3 wants a relationship.  CC+4 and I live 8,000 miles apart.  And now I just have to convince myself that spending time with CC+4 will do nothing but make the break in my heart more painful when I leave.  It’s time to let go.

But … if that’s the case – why does my heart feel this way??

Look the guy blew my mind with his wit and sarcasm the first night I met him and that same night after hours of conversation he ended the night with a peck – and only a peck – on my lips and walked away.  I was surprised yet happy about it – though BEWILDERED because the dumbdumb guy didn’t ask for my digits.  What?  Yeah he didn’t.

Well time went on and I ran into him again.  He confessed his dumbdumbness regret about the digits and then whisked me off my feet.  Pretty literally.  AANND he took no time at all to turn the peck from the time before into a little badaboom vroom vroom and we totally pashed.  [wait - no reprimands yet please.]

THEN we saw each other a few times and he pulled a DTR on me.  WHAT?  A DTR is a “Define the Relationship” talk where you decide if the badaboom really has enough vroom vroom to go anywhere. I was FURIOUS.  I had prevented and managed to escape any and all forms of DTRs for the past 2 years.  And then what – I go on like 2 or 3 dates with this dude and he’s asking me where it’s going?  Umm – No thank you please.  Go away.

So I told him I didn’t see it going anywhere and he was like, “That’s good because I was worried you may be looking for something and I really want to take this slow” and then he slowly faded from my daily life.  Hmm … surprise surprise right?  Who wouldn’t slowly disappear after what I said?  (let’s NOT mention how I also pushed away CC-450 by telling him I was dating tons of people right now even though I WAS dating significantly less because I really really liked CC-450 even though he APPARENTLY didn’t like me and ok? thanks! xo)

I’ve got issues!  I know!

So blah blah blah – I met up with this “wow” when I got back from holiday and he was so NOT wow.  In fact he was a total DB.  To the EXTREME.  And then FM forbade me from seeing him again.  Until finally TODAY I decided it’s been long enough and I could see him again.  But I strictly or not so strictly decided I was going to just be his FRIEND - a NO KISSING friend (we were always JUST friends anyway – whatever.)

Well I was doing well when I saw him.  He went in for the customary kiss on the cheek greeting but wait – hold up – he wasn’t going for my cheek – umm … what do I do?  umm … pause – awkwardness – dart left, dart right – darn darn – why did he just move when I went for his cheek?

UGH!  Look I TRIED to go for his cheek.  I did.  I promise.  But he was NOT going to let that happen.  So I got a smooch.  Which is WHATEVER because I KNOW he does that with his other friends – wait what?  Yeah – he’s like a kiss slut and NO that doesn’t mean he and I are destined to be together.

So then we had a lovely dinner.  We had a lovely chat after dinner and before we knew it we had talked for HOURS.  And then he drove me home (but in the American way which means we got into his car and drove to my house and not in the AUSSIE way which means something very different.)  At my house I said goodbye and went in for a kiss on the cheek again – because I’m strong like that and THAT was when he smooched me AGAIN! And THEN I pulled away and he stayed there.  And stayed there.  And stayed there.  And I was like, “Umm …”

Ok just kidding it was more like I went in for the cheek and didn’t feel bad at ALL when he went for the lips and then I pulled away but noticed he stayed so I went back.  hee hee.  I’m bad I know.

BUT GET THIS!  That’s it.  Yeah.  I know!

And then he asked me to come do some work for him on the side next week. Umm … ???      ????

Well alrighty then – that’s fan-flippin-tastic. We’ve gone from friends to friends who pash to friends who don’t talk to friends who smooch to business??  Wait – but that’s not what I had in the cards!!!  OOOH!  I got PLAYED!

Yes-sir-ee-bob I was played.

And I liked it.

NOW BACK TO LIFE.

I have to tell you that I wrote this super great post for today – and then I sent it to my mom and she LOL-d.  And not because she’s my mom – but because it was funny.  BUT THEN SHE SAID TO NOT POST IT – say what?  Yeah – she thinks it would be best to wait because it’s a little TOO current.  So I’ll wait – ohIdon’tknow – a week.  Yeah – a week.  Maybe next week I can tell you about dumb boys.

In the meantime I should tell you a different story.

ONCE  UPON A TIME (oh this will take forever … remember the story of the ugly duckling?  Substitute a dandelion for the duckling and a daisy for the swan and you’ve got the jist of the story. )  Ok so I just spared you 90% of the story.  WAHOO!!  I’m being economical. 

The part you missed was when this ugly dandelion/tom boy/ NERD was like 10 years old she was diagnosed with asthma.  But it was a hassle and the inhaler WASN’T COOL so she couldn’t be fussed and then FORGOT ALL ABOUT IT!

Fast forward to Daisy time. I went to the Dr. because some days I can jog-it-up left and right and others I feel like I’m going to kill over after 1 minute!  Not cool.  So the Dr. was like, “Hmm – that’s strange.” So he took FOUR vials of blood and gave me a heart x-ray (this was last week) – everything came back normal except he said I need to eat more red meat – and THEN he said, “No one in your family has asthma do they?”

DARN DARN DARN DARN DARN

I smiled.  “Umm … well … I was diagnosed with it when I was like 10 but surely I don’t have it anymore right?”

[long pause.]

Let’s skip the part where he reacted to my news and I felt dumb.  We DEFINITELY can skip that part.

Well anyway … he made me do some dumb breathing test at the lab – which I failed – and now I have an inhaler.  LAME LAME LAME LAME LAME.

But the good news is that I go back in one month to see if my daily treatments help.  I’m hoping he’ll tell me it was all a misunderstanding. Hey – it could happen.  Sure the asthma thing explains a whole lot – but I’m not convinced.  AND if I fail the breathing test AGAIN in a month I can be like “See?  I DON’T have it – I just have poor breathing test technique.”  -IT COULD HAPPEN-

I can tell you that I never imagined that I’d turn 27 in a foreign country.  And I always imagined I’d feel much more grown up by the time I became ancient and ohsowise in my late 20s.  Shouldn’t I have a full-on, full-blown career by 27?  Shouldn’t I be living in New York City?  Ah well … Sydney’s not too shabby. 

So – what am I doing to celebrate today?  First I’m going to go to sleep (staying up past midnight every night is a terribly immature and mid 20s thing.)  And then if I’m lucky, fate will be kind and I’ll be able to snap a pic of that macho fannypack strutting man at the Junction.  Oh if only I could be so lucky …

Anywho – since I’m only a few minutes into my late 20s I don’t have anything profound to share with you yet … maybe by tonight when I’ve been ohsowise for 12+ hours I’ll have something wonderfully fantastic to share…  But so as not to disappoint – please allow me to share a profound thought and a few beautiful pictures from my Sunday morning walk:

Profound Thought – “You are what you eat – and tonight I’m passionfruit gelato.” haha!  Just teasing – how about this:

Man makes plans; God laughs.

Quite a fitting thought for me on my birthday, yes?

Can you believe this view?

Have I mentioned how much I love TAKING pictures?  Not just of myself either. 

We were out walking for 4 hours today.

Which is good because I have like 5-10 kg (10-15 lbs) to lose!!!

Speaking of weight … I decided to give up my self-consciousness for a day…

And notso rocked a bikini at the beach yesterday …

I felt super self-conscious and was relieved to get in the water – EXCEPT

It’s been awhile since I wore a bikini like that so I wasn’t prepared for the waves and …

I learned the hard way that if you’re not careful, you’ll 1-butt-cheek-flash people.

And then I learned the hard way that big waves like the ones yesterday ALSO can make you accidentally 2-butt-cheek-flash people (or “moon” – whichever you prefer)

And then I learned the hard way that these same waves can make you do the “no-bikini-bottom” flash …

And last but not least, I learned those waves ALSO make you boob-flash people.

Wow – ok – so yay for Bondi!  They got more than they bargained for yesterday.  But it’s all good.  I was on the Gay Side of the beach (yes – it’s true – there is a Gay Side and they are VERY proud if it) so even though I was flashing people left and right (on accident) no one was perving.  Haha!  Except for ME – I’ve never seen so many perfectly chiseled and hot men in one place in my life.  The Gay Side of the beach is now the side for me.

And NoooOoooOooo this is not a wikipedia picture – I took this one all by myself – TODAY. I didn’t die (yeah yeah – I know) and I finally fell back asleep, only to be woken by a buzzing.  Bzzzz.  Killer spiders and now killer moths AGAIN!  Apparently announcing my woes last night in my blog resulted in their recurrence.  (Wait – Daisy – do moths actually buzz? – I don’t know – but what else could be buzzing in my ear in the middle of the pitch black night?  Don’t answer that – I may be less scared of moths than whatever your answer is.)

Ok so I was up and at it by 6:30 this morning and you can imagine just how chipper I was after a night of almost no sleep.  Superduperchipper.  Though my mood lightened a bit when I caught the early bus which ended up being slow; HOWEVER it was filled with hotties.  Superduperhotties.  Man oh man – if only I had understood that correct train/bus time is critical for superduperhottie stalking I could have filled up my name page with like 40 more boys!!!

My first class was through this door.

Did I mention that I’ve switched from the Uni of Syd to the Ghetto Jungle?  I just hope they have hip hop inside.  Hip hop makes everything better.  No seriously – it makes everything better.  Even ice cream.  And pancakes.

Ok – that was weird.  Moving on!  I liked class number 1, I also liked class number 2 and I thoroughly enjoyed these local hang outs:

I noticed a couple interesting things on campus today.

1. My skirt was too short – but not as short as everyone else’s dresses and shorts.
2. I look as young or younger than many of the undergraduate students.
3. I’m about to turn 27 and there are 19-22 year old men/boys eying me.  I think this makes me a cougar?  Hmm … I suppose I’m ok with that.  FM’s GF and I discussed (outrageously!) that maybe to celebrate my entrance into the late twenties that I should date someone from every age between 19 to 26 before 2010.   That’s quite a lofty goal – 8 men in one year – but considering I went on 7 dates with 7 different men in only 6 days back in January 2009 (yes – it’s true) – I may be able to swing it.  AGH!  I’m a shocka!!!  The only difficulty with this “aspiration” is that I still have a stupid crush on CC+4 even though I know I’m being ridiculous by still having it – and since I’ve decided to look for substance I just don’t see how I can look for substance AND date hot boys based on their age.  Darn it – there goes that fab idea out the window!
4. Spicy Salmon rolls are NOT as good as Salmon and Avocado rolls.
5. And if I swing it correctly – lunch time could become my new networking/social endeavor.

Ok so this post is already outrageously long!  So I’ll sum up the rest of the day with a couple pics:

First Day of School Picture – I’m not sure what I’m listening to – probably one of the kick-A songs that CC+4 sent.  The “Hot Thing” one was sweet – but “Pop the Glock” was even better.  There’s also a chance I was listening to some Meiko – I love her songs “Reasons to Love you” and “Piano Song.”

What a crappy pic eh?  Oh well – on to the next.  First semester I met Bruce -  he is a kindred spirit and a life saver!!!!  Pic from Semester 1:

Pic from semester 2: Bruce says I look younger … but I’m pretty sure my name isn’t Benjamin Button.

It was amazing to catch up with Bruce – he is like a wise fortune teller.  Except he doesn’t predict the future.    He just has an uncanny knack for really understanding the HERE and NOW.

Next I saw the following sign – wteff?  and I learned another latin dance.

So there you have it.  A VERY long day.  Very very long.  I didn’t get home until midnight and feel like I haven’t slept for days.  I am SOOOOOO crashing tomorrow – and maybe doing some reading on the beach.  Which btw – I have some great points to make on the book “How To Win Friends and Influence People” – so maybe I’ll get to that this week.  Oh and I haven’t forgotten – I need to post my cricket video!  YAY!!!

Does anyone else salsa dance?  How long did it take you to learn?  I seriously suck.

So I was right about LOSER (that’s his new name) – I’ve added our text convo at the end of this post for your drama/gossip pleasure.  It was so awesome it made we want to “woot!  woot!” forty times in a row.  If you missed yesterday’s post click here.

Want to know what Crysta (my BFF) wrote on my facebook wall?  “Nice snowman.  Where are his eyes, mouth and nose?”  Say what?  You mean those three completely deformed globs of snow balancing precariously on each other don’t count as a snowman?

Want to know what my mom said to me after watching my snowman video?  “I feel like Chloe was neglected in your video and that you are showing favoritism to Duchess.”  So mom – just for you – Chloe.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oOLiFH_fOp4]

EEW!  Gross!  My dog was on my bed?  Sick!!!!  How do I live with myself? 

Oh and here is a great picture (not!) to show you just how AWESOME today has been – and yes I DID stick my finger in an electrical socket to get my hair like that.  I call this picture “Today is so Gee Whiz Awesome.”  And it is – because on any other day there is NO WAY I’d ever post such a crappy picture – but TODAY?  Anything goes.  Including LOSER!  He’s going right out the door to the dog house – no no – not the dog house – the PIG house.  My dogs live in style.

TEXT CONVERSATION WITH LOSER:

Daisy – Hey Sexy! What time were you thinking?

Loser – I’m not sure.

Daisy – Not sure?  lol.  Do you want me to play it by ear on a FRI night?  I usually like to make plans … so if you have other plans …

Loser – Yeah let’s play it by ear.  I’m moving today and then there’s ____’s party so I’m not sure what time will work.  Sorry.

(side note – _____’s party was a game day party – it wouldn’t and didn’t get over until after 10:00 PM! – so his plans were to see me AFTER 10:00 PM!!! – not cool.)

Daisy – lol.  I was saying I like to have plans because I DON’T play fri nights by ear. Xx. 

Loser – (TWO HOURS LATER) – Oh I ment (yes he spelled it wrong) to say if you need to make other plans that’s cool.  Sorry.

Daisy – Oh no worries.  I think a bunch of us are meeting up for the game and then going out dancing or to other parties after.  If you are free later you should join us.

Loser – Ok.

PHONE CALL – not to ME -  Loser has his roommate call Matty Matt and ask which game party we’re going to.  Matty Matt tells him and then Voila!  Loser decides to NOT show up.  Which ended up being pretty sweet because the party was SOOOOO fun and it would have been AWKWARD.