First I had an assignment due – a big one.  That was due 2 weeks ago.  I still haven’t handed it in.  Things haven’t been going as smoothly as hoped.

Day 20, 21 & 22- when I was still optimistic about my essay

Day 23 and 24 – Remember how I decided no more kissing North Sydney because HE IS A COMMITMENTPHOBE who FREAKS OUT every time HE kisses me!?!?  Yeah – that didn’t last long.  And then I went to my international adviser and she told me that she struggling to try and work with me because I’m smarter than her and my life is very complicated.  Gee – that’s encouraging. (insert glare.)

Day 25 and 26 -  I think it was about THIS point in my life when I discovered North Sydney didn’t remember ANYTHING about our meeting, his “stalk you later” phone calls and our very brief romance a year ago.  I very bluntly called this to his attention. :)  He tried to kiss and make up – I rolled my eyes and laughed.  Then I tried to do my essay and fell asleep over and over again.  Oh and I discovered I can tell the difference between fresh and not-as-fresh M&Ms. oh yes.

Day 27 – I went and met with the adviser again and this time she was more encouraging.  We determined that I’m having issues with essay writing because of my first semester as a graduate student when I had a super nasty teacher who used her dislike of my nationality to influence the marks she gave me.  As a straight 95% and above student my whole life – I lost all confidence in my ability to be a student after I received her grades and this lack of confidence is a detriment to my current studies.  :(  We agreed that discrimination and racism are out of my control and I need to try and move forward.  I decided to study in the park under the bright and beautiful sun.

Day 28 -  I actually went to class – instead of staying home sick like I did the rest of the week.  Class was REALLY good – I’m in the process of animating a girl on a swing set.  It’s a lot of fun and I can do it for hours and hours without getting bored.  A BIG relief from essay writing.

Day 29 and 30 – I’ve had insomnia like no other the past couple of weeks.  “Bones” the television series has become my nightly insomnia treatment.  It also makes for great dreams.  I’ve never been a better crime fighter/super hero/pretend anthropologist in my life. :) lol.

Day 31 – One month down – 12 more to go.

It means “I love you” in sign language.  I might have accidentally kind of said something that would indicate the possibility that I COULD be in love with North Sydney.  I didn’t mean to!!  It slipped out!!!

He said- “You need to have kids.  You will be a great mom.”  (a nice compliment bcuz he has a child.)

I said – “Yeah but finding the right guy is going to be next to impossible.  I think I’ll just settle with my dogs – they’re like my kids.”

He laughed and said, “You’re getting close.  If you mix CC+4 with -3 you’d almost get the perfect man for you.”

I said, “Yeah but I’m never going to meet someone who is perfect and there isn’t going to be a guy out there who is a cross between all the good of CC+4 and all the good of -3.”

He said, “You never know…”

I said, “What I really need is just to find the American version of you – then I’d be set.”

I CAN’T BELIEVE I SAID THAT!!!

I told my flatmate that I couldn’t believe I let that one slip out!!!  North Sydney gets scared off every time he kisses me – and then I tell him he’s like the perfect guy for me??  My flatmate said, “Yeah but do you feel that way?”  I said – “Yes.”  And my flatmate said, “Well then you told the truth.  You shouldn’t be worried about it.”

He’s right.  I told the truth.  And fortunately for me – North Sydney DIDN’T freak out – he just took it as a compliment – and things are the same as always.  :)

Day 17 – A not so great day

Day 18 – today I had my ipod on the most downer playlist I have … I had a great day.  I made a new friend, got some work done – it’s just that my spirits are still a little bit low (see pic yesterday.)  I liked this street art – his look matched my emotions.  (and the over-saturation on just my hair??? HAHA!  Well – I have always said I want to be a super-villain – this was step one.  ;)

Why did I do it?  Because I was bored. I had to wait around for the FedEx guy to arrive and he was taking FOREVER!  Plus everyone knows that logging onto the internet is what you should do when you’re bored.  [umm ...]  So I logged on and updated my status. Within minutes of logging on I had ten new messages.  WHAT?  This site has tons of married people on it – it’s a “networking site” – but we all REALLY know that it’s mostly used for dating. So LUCKY me!  And you! Because I’m sharing the sweet messages I got today:

• Why aren’t you married?  (yep that’s all it said.  Hmm … I know why YOU aren’t with THAT pick-up line!)
• I’m an ex-cop now working in TV.  Hope to hear back from you. 
  
• I stubbled across your profile.  Wanted to say hi.  (You stubbled?  I didn’t know that was a word.)
• Dang!!!, I take it your done with utah? too bad I missed you  (no no sweetie – thank GOODNESS I missed you.)
• Hey Red, how is your day?  I lived in Brisbane for 2 years.  btw I’m a Psychologist.  (Btw – I don’t care and don’t EVER call me “red.”)
• What!  you went to the UofU and didn’t say hey to me.  Do you have any super powers? (YES I DO!!!  Omgosh. How did he know?)
• Thanks for inviting me for a swim!  (What?  But I didn’t … umm … WHAT?)
• What are your favorite guilty pleasures?  (Umm hello?  Go away gross-o.  This isn’t a drama class or a romance novel.)

The others (there were about 12 more by the end of the day) were either acceptable or slight variations of the above.  So what type of responses WILL get a reply from me? Ones that make me laugh. But mostly I just look at the profile pic and go from there.  Let’s be real here – it’s an online networking aka dating site – I’m allowed to be superficial. 

Here’s a pic from New Zealand last week.  My t-shirt says “Stop Youth Obesity” and there’s a chubby boy catapulting a skinny boy off a see-saw.  On a scale from 1-angel to 10-devil – my FM says this puts me at 12. But … but … but …

My day started out great.   Not only did I get to talk to my Ultimate BFF, Matty Matt and my Mom on the phone but I also talked to CC+4 on Skype (insert insuppressible smile ) wait – I’m in a bad mood — what’s going on?  No smiling!!! This post is about why I’m FRUSTRATED not about some boy who makes me smile… it’s time to get SERIOUS! 

Back in SLC there was a radio station (X96) that published a list of “Things that must go” every Wednesday.  Today isn’t Wednesday and I’m not in SLC but I’m making a list of “Things that must go” anyway!  These aren’t in any particular order btw.

Things That Must Go!!!

1. Potatoes that explode in my oven because I forgot to prick them.  (HAHA- it’s so funny!  It sounded like a bomb went off in my oven.  LOL!!!!) – Wait – back to being serious.
2. People who leave food in the refrigerator until months after it expires. GROSS!
3. In relation to #2 – companies who neglect to put an expiration date on their packaging.  PUT AN EXPIRATION DATE ON YOUR FOOD!
4. People who flake out at the last minute leaving ME to do their part of the assignment.
5. The University of Sydney.
6. Boys who are like twice my age and who I did NOT flirt with but who ask me out anyway. NO!!!!!
7. People who say “____ Day is unlucky because 4 years ago I had a really bad day on that day.”  Umm – so did you have any additional bad days on that particular day?  “No” Hmm … Get over it!
8. People who think it’s OK to wear lavender Hawaiian prints with turquoise zebra prints.  (See pic at right)  HAHAHA!  Just teasing – these people should NEVER stop mix-matching patterns- it provides great amusement  And hold up – yeah that’s a little mean – but  I told you I was a super villain too. 

Wow!  Do I feel better already?  No.  But I’m getting there.  HAHA!  Just teasing.  I DO feel better.  Who wouldn’t feel better after seeing that picture?  lol.  And NOW I feel like I’m ready to try the whole baked potato thing again (without an explosion.)  After that?  HOMEWORK – which sucks.  But the GOOD NEWS is that I may get deported because the Uni of Syd can’t get their act together.  Oh wait … hmm …

Anyway – today I am happy to announce that I have discovered I have Extraordinary Obvious Pocket Locating Pow-ah (Power). Are you impressed?  Because you should be.  You see, as I mentioned in the linked post above, superhero powers that are a mouthful to say are better than those that are not.  And that means Extraordinary Obvious Pocket Locating Pow-ah is awesome by the title ALONE.  HOWEVER that’s not the ONLY reason why this power is so flipping sweet. No no, this power rocks because it gives me the ability to hide/store stuff – like cool superhero stuff – like lipgloss. 

Want to know how I discovered this cool power?  I found a “new” pocket on one of my skirts today and then – the VERY SAME DAY (which is still today) – I discovered that the “decorative” pocket on my super fly new hat is actually functional! Decorative AND useful. How cool is that?

So anyway – that’s my BIG news for today. Extraordinary Obvious Pocket Locating Pow-ah.  I can’t really top that.  It’s just too cool.  Oh wait – omgosh – I ALMOST forgot!  I can’t TOP that but I do have other important news.  I’ve fallen in love with lychees.  Have you ever had a lychee? (spelled “litchi” in the U.S.) YUM. I LUV them.

Ok – better start my homework. I’m the only one in my group who does the reading so I have to do 3x as much. Have a happy Friday! And please feel sorry for me as it’s going to be a scor-cha tomorrow (spelled “omgosh it’s so hot I think I’m going to die” in the U.S.) with temps close to like 1,000,000 Celsius and at least 134% humidity.  That’s hot.  So hot I won’t be able to wear my super fly new hat.  But hey – at least I’m a superhero. Do YOU have any cool superhero pow-ahs?

I LUV the Venus razor. It’s great right? Right! Well the other day I was going to wear a skirt to a club and though I had shaved my legs that morning with my trusty Venus – I wanted a fresh shave for the night. I didn’t have time to run home so I stopped off at the store and bought the necessary ingredients for a Vegas shave (lotion and a razor.) It works like a charm!

Or at least it does with the Venus.

I was in a hurry and just grabbed a cheap-o disposable razor because my girlfriend said it works just as well in a bind.

Umm …

WRONG!!!

I bet you already see where this is going! Did you see about 40 trillion gajillion little pricks of blood all over my cut-up legs? If you did then you must be psychic! Congrats! That’s a cool superhero power. And I bet you also saw that I would NOT be wearing a skirt because of it either. A great way to save time right? I got to waste even MORE time changing clothes!!!

Life lesson? Don’t trust the people who tell you cheap-o disposable razors are ok in a bind. It’s not true.

And on a positive note I felt like a pre-teen again shaving my legs for the first time. Ah – such happy – terrible horrible very traumatic – memories.  Hooray for me!

Oh and I don’t know why but I feel the need to tell you I’m in love with the song “Day N Nite (Crookers Remix)” by Kid Cudi.

I’m pretty sure I’d be turned into Jean Grey/Phoenix.  (see picture at left)  I’ve given this some SERIOUS thought because it’s SUPER important – and Jean Grey who is also Phoenix is my conclusion.

Where is all of this coming from?  I was bored tonight so I started a Pop Art Photoshop tutorial (see picture below/right) and turned myself into a comic book dream (except it was my first try so it kind of sucks.)

My comic book message for today is “Please send me mixed messages and then insult me.  It’s fun!”   This is a little shout out for MIUB.  YOU SUCK!  Ok not really.  We’re friends and I enjoy talking to him.

ANYWHO – today we started talking about how many people we’ve kissed this year.  AND NO THIS WASN’T A COMPETITION – it was more of a Matty-Matt-gives-me-a-hard-time-and-so-I-want-to-know-if-he-is-justified/ “Am I above the normal range?” compare-and-contrast type of talk.  So apparently I AM above the normal range – (for Utah) but whatever – MIUB is too.  And that actually made me feel better – in a weird twisted way.  Should I really be happy that he kissed as many people as me this year?  I think yes.  It means we’re about par with each other. 

EEWWW! but GET THIS!! He had the nerve to say, “Where do you meet all of these guys?”  WHAT??  Oh so he can meet that many girls (which I was one of them btw) but I can’t find the same in return?

WHAT.EVER.

But the good news is (despite all of this) he told me that some of his memories of our time together go through his mind on replay.  And so yeah – I’m glad I’m not forgettable. 

Back in the good old U.S. of A. I have a Wii that is probably collecting dust. (Is it Scott Pete?) I loved my Wii. And I LOVED Wii Boxing. I was like, seriously, I was like ACE at that game. I could take down ANYONE.

Sore losers would always be like, “Yeah but this is just a video game.”

And in my head I’d be like “Whatever loser. You’re just jealous because I’m like the girl version of Rocky.”

Tonight I went to my very first boxing CLASS. And not a Wii class btw – this one was the real deal and was down at the beach. My instructor was so impressed with my skills that he asked me where I learned to punch and move as well as I do.

Want to know what I told him?

Oh yeah baby – that’s right. I told him I earned my skills on a video game. That’s right. My mad moves come from Wii Boxing. Take THAT Sydney!

Oh and p.s. – I’m sore already. I’ll be lucky if I can lift my arms above my head tomorrow.

I tried to kill the same spider 6 times today – I’m pretty sure I was successful on the 6^th try. I killed one yesterday too. I think my superhuman peripheral spider radar vision is stronger than ever. My spider paranoia is also stronger than ever.

It’s pretty flippin amazing how out of shape I became in only 9 days. I exercised this morning and was huffing enough to audition for the Big Bad Wolf. All I did was WALK.

BIG NEWS!!! I took the bus for the first time in my life today. And then I took the train. And THEN I walked a mile from the train station to class. I wore my backpack. My backpack suffocates my back. It was pretty darn sexy when I finally got to class and took my backpack off. The back of my shirt was drenched in sweat.

gross.

And while I’m sharing embarrassing things… I’m listening to Jesse McCartney right now. On REPEAT.

Which is why this gift is such a burden. Superhuman powers that are a mouthful to say are more special than the ones that aren’t. Let’s just agree that I’m right.

It’s like the time in the middle of the night that I crawled out of bed to go to the bathroom and caught by the reflection of moonlight the spider crawling up my bare thigh. If I wasn’t cursed with this amazing gift I wouldn’t have had to SCREAM, freak-out, and in a spasm to get that blasted thing OFF of me I wouldn’t have bruised my hip on the bathroom counter.

Or today when I noticed on the ceiling above my shower a little BIG HUGE spider that was most assuredly harmless a deadly one that was more scared of me than I was of it wanted to not only BITE me but to burrow under my skin causing a slow and painful death… if I didn’t have this gift I wouldn’t have had to try and balance precariously on the toilet and use a roll of toilet paper to try and kill it. And then when it didn’t die and started crawling along the toilet paper roll toward my SKIN I wouldn’t have dropped the last roll of toilet paper into the running shower, screamed, fallen off the toilet and then panicked to try and find out where the spider landed.

Oh the joys of superhuman powers. And p.s. heebie-jeebies is a word. I attached the definition.