My stupid horoscope day 8 – guess JUST FRIENDS is best

Posted on August 8, 2009 by Daisy

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Now playing: Akon – Beautiful
via FoxyTunes

Want to know what I like to call a BIG SUCKS?? When I decide I’m into a dude only to decide I’m going to follow my horoscope for a month only to find out that my horoscope says we should JUST BE FRIENDS!!! Say WHHHAAAATTT???

Yeah – that’s what it said. The EXACT words?? Beautiful Venus is quite active today in your 5th House of Love and Romance, possibly increasing your desire to spend quality time with someone you love. But there’s no need to add complex layers of attachment to a new or existing relationship, for the real gift of this transit is to bless you with the ability to live joyfully in the here and now.

Lame. But at the same time?? True. DANG IT!!!!

I DID spend quality time with North Sydney today. Want to know what we talked about?? My feelings for CC+4. Yes – go ahead and shake your fists at me – roll your eyes – whatever you must – but North Sydney kissed me the last time we hung out AND YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS?? He had another mini freak out and had to distance himself again in order to prevent himself from getting TOO close to me. Whatever. So since he was in super FRIEND zone he asked me to tell him the story about the cruise. So I did.

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Now playing: Kid Cudi – Day ‘N’ Nite (Crookers Remix)
via FoxyTunes

And THEN when I was FINALLY BRAVE ENOUGH

I told him that I can’t kiss him anymore if it’s going to make him withdraw from me. The fact is that I adore him – I care about our friendship and I LOVE spending time with him. And if he can’t do a relationship right now – ok. I’d rather be his friend with no kissing than have him be so scared of getting close.

AND THEN I ASKED HIM WHY HE’S SCARED OF GETTING CLOSE TO ME

And he couldn’t answer that one. So what did I do?? I kissed him goodbye – a good kiss. ;) And now he can think about it. But the fact of it is – my horoscope is true – I should enjoy the time I spend with him and not worry about anything more.

at least for now …

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Now playing: Hilary Duff – Reach Out (Bonus Track)
via FoxyTunes

Day 7/365 Reflections in the glass – a girl should always own a pearl necklace

AAANNNDDD Reflections in my eyes … click HERE for the original size – you can see the green grass and the blue sky in my eyes

Day 4 – Some much needed ME time

Posted on August 4, 2009 by Daisy

TODAY’s horoscope

You may become less confident as the day wears on, especially if you must show up at a big social event. But if you are able to steal away for a while, then you can emerge from your mini-retreat revitalized and ready to go back out for another round of battles with the status quo. Don’t be afraid of your own power, even if you think it’s wiser to wait for the right time to act.

Annnddd yahoo.com’s said something about taking time for myself and writing a list of “to dos”….

LESS CONFIDENT

I was pretty confident about life this morning but as luck would have it (or more likely as my subconscious would have it because I had already read the above horoscope) I DID lose confidence in myself as the day wore on. WHAT?? Why would I ever do a thing like that?

Prolly because I realized I’m in some suck classes, the camera adds 10 lbs, I stuttered on TV today and I ran into TWO professors who gave me the pity look because they know about my stupid special consideration and swine flu last semester.

Yeah – that could be why.

Some ME Time

I was kind of excited that my horoscope encouraged a little ME time today but I wasn’t sure how I was going to fit it in – I had a full schedule today!! After my first class I decided to skip class #2 because it sucks and I’m going to change it for a different one anyway … and I had a choice:

BUS OR WALK??

WALK of course!! Why? Because walking is ME time!! YAY!!! So I walked from Uni to Central and did some thinking – lots of thinking. Mostly about the pavement, the cars driving by, the hotties in business suits – but ALSO about Uni, my list of things to do – and ok – that was about all. Unless you count trying to decide whether or not to text/sms No. Syd and tell him about my day’s adventures as thinking – if you do? well then I thought about that a lot too.

I decided to text him – and got no reply. And not that I’m getting ready to throw in the towel or anything but seriously – EVERY TIME I DECIDE I LIKE A GUY IT ENDS WITHIN LIKE A WEEK. So I wouldn’t be terribly surprised if the Love Gods out there put a jinx on this whole thing – aw well. Time will tell.

No backing out now!!

Even if things don’t work with No. Syd guess what? I meant what I said about the taking a chance thing – no more negative nancy from me about relationships. I am ready to put myself on the line – it may take a REALLY LONG time before I find someone that I want to commit to – it may take a REALLY LONG time before I start dating again … but I’m not going to be actively AGAINST it like I was. In fact! I even replied to Adorable Boy’s (he was the reason I went on the cruise where I met CC+4) email today. He wants to come visit. I told him that’d be great. And you know what will happen if Adorable Boy comes out to visit? hee hee. SPARKS WILL FLY! :)

I HATE TOMORROW’s HOROSCOPE

I just want everyone to know that I already hate tomorrow’s horoscope. WHY?? Because it is going to require super extra effort on my part to make it come true. The task?? Find meaning in the mundane things you do. And after the 2 page long TO DO list I made today of MUNDANE SUCK THINGS TO DO!!! Tomorrow is DEFINITELY going to be a challenge.

But the joy is in the challenge right?? :)

Crazy going slowly am I

Posted on July 31, 2009 by Daisy

crazy

Whenever I reached the ultimate heights of boredom as a child I would recite, “I am slowly going crazy, crazy going slowly am I” over and over while I puttered around doing whatever it is I could find to do. Aaannnndddd OMGOSH seriously – that sounds a lot worse than it really is.

No seriously.

WHAT?? You mean NORMAL people don’t do that? WhatevvvvER. Scott Pete sometimes did it too. We’d recite it together and then get the giggles – yep yep.

I AM SLOWLY GOING CRAZY

True story – 5 minutes ago I bumped my bobby pin holder off my dresser. I looked down and was like “What a mess.” And then I said this outloud:

“Sweet! At least I now have something to do for a minute.”

THAT’S RIGHT! I talk to myself :)

But I think the most disturbing part of this story is not that I talk to myself but that I was actually happy to clean up a pile of bobby pins.

Before you think I’m TOO pathetic!!

It’s not that there aren’t things I COULD do – of COURSE there are things I could do. It’s a matter of WANTING to do them. I’ve done all of the boring stuff – unpacked, cleaned, made my bed – ya know – boring stuff. And now? I think I’ve done so many boring things that now I’m not just bored – now nothing even sounds fun!! Lame.

Goss update:

#3 – sent me my phone via post – I thanked him via text (sms) and I think that’s the end of him.

CC+4 – I sent him this totally groovin’ ‘get your groove thang on’ song bcuz it’s SO HOT except I decided to ruin the song for him by telling him I think about him when I listen to it. I feel mildly guilty for this – however the mild guilt does not suppress the devilish delight that makes me chuckle at the thought of it. I will be going on another singles cruise in January – he’ll be there also – only time will tell if we’re ever cruise crushes again … but I doubt it.

Captain Charisma – OMGOSH! We haven’t talked about him in a LLLLOOOOONNNNNGGGGG time. But he’s back in the picture bcuz well – he’s hot and he likes American humor. :) Ok ok – also because I’m boyless and he always seems to be around when I am free. :)

North Sydney – seeing him tomorrow – excited but a little nervous too. AGH!

Work – they’re not giving casual workers any hours until October – so very quiet on that front. However I went in to say hi and that was fun.

Ok – that’s enough out of me – I think I’ll play eyeshadow for a bit and then go buy nail polish remover. Sweeeeeet.

The post that never was, closure w/CC+4 and yay for friends!!!

Posted on July 30, 2009 by Daisy

Have you ever written a blog post only to find it mysteriously disappeared?? That happened to me yesterday – it was a big sucks. I explained how I finally got closure on CC+4 and I told a snotty/funny story which can’t be recreated so to sum up the gossip – he basically informed me that WITH ME he was only looking for a good time – say WHAT?? Niiiiiicccccceeeeee. And I call bull-crap! Why? Because he also confessed a while back that the reason he stopped talking to me last semester was because he was looking for MORE and he thought I was only looking for a good time. But WHAT.EV.ER. I suppose if we’re making attempts to be happyhappyjoyjoy we could be grateful for the closure. YAY FOR CLOSURE!!!

or something like that …

Do things happen for a reason?

Who knows for sure – but looking back on the past year of my life I can tell you I can kind of see how lucky I am to have had the trials and difficulties I once hated. It’s been a crazy path – a tearful journey – and also lots of fun!!! I’ve grown so much – even my family has noticed!! And I want to give a shout out to all of my bloggy friends, all of my new friends in Sydney, all of my old friends in Utah and … I think it’s time to give a special shout out to North Sydney – my BFF in Australia.

Thank you – all of you!!

You make my life brighter. :)

And now – back to that special shout out to my Aus-BFF … remember CommitmentPhobe? No? That’s ok. He was the first man to sweep me off my feet in Australia. Charming – hot – romantic – I was scared and when he gave me flowers I left them at his house. GASP!!!! Daisy how could you??

I know – I know … but I was scared. I wasn’t ready for a relationship and really? He wasn’t either. So we became friends. And now? One whole year later we’re the best of friends. I absolutely adore him. And it’s driving me crazy that I haven’t seen him for FIVE WEEKS!!! FIVE WEEKS!!!! I think it bothered him as well … not only did he complain about the length of my trip but he scheduled my first Saturday night home well in advance. lol. I talked to him yesterday (the day I arrived) and I told him I want as much of his Saturday as I can have. He laughed – but I think he feels the same way.

Friends and family are the spice of life – they give a dreary day a spark of color, a dash of flavor/flavour.

And you know what? That’s something to smile about.

Dancing on the soccer field – I confess to CC+4

Posted on July 26, 2009 by Daisy

I know what you’re probably thinking … you’re probably thinking I have some sort of ill wish on my heart because I keep hanging out with CC+4. Why would I do that??? The more time we spend together the more we get to know each other – the more we get to know each other the more we like each other – and the more we like each other the more fun we have. I can’t resist – and even though I know the more fun we have the more sucky the goodbye will be again when I leave him a second time on Monday -

I can’t resist.

-3 was a total douchebag for so many more reasons than I ever was willing to blog about – but he was right about one thing. I wasn’t into it 100%.

I couldn’t be. Here’s another pic from that boating day …

I’ve said all along I needed resolution with CC+4 before I’d ever be able to give my heart fully to anyone else – and coming back to Utah – realizing that CC+4 is the ONLY person who can tempt me away from my reclusive family life – and yeah – I don’t know where I’m going with this – but you know that feeling when you’re in a crowded room, or stadium, or party but you feel completely secure, almost oblivious to the chaos around?

The world kind of disappears when I’m with CC+4 -

I’m THAT into him.

Last night he asked me out on a proper date. He invites me to do things ALL OF THE TIME but generally I have other plans and yeah – anyway – it was Pioneer Day yesterday so we went to a Major League Soccer Game – he was fun and flirtatious – looked fly as always – and we were with a big group and he made sure that everyone knew he was taken for the night. lol. After the game we went onto the field to watch the fireworks – he held me close and we sat away from our group.

AAANNNDDD then AFTER the fireworks -

the stadium lights turned on

and there in the middle of the soccer field …

he grabbed me and we danced.

Yes – we danced.

He spun me around, held me close, danced me in circles and put #3′s elevator dancing to complete shame. lol. I’m teasing – but let’s compare. A quick dance in an elevator – a long dance in front of tons of people on the field of a major league soccer field? I guess it’s not just Australians who know how to romance a girl.

And as a quick fyi – my FM should be proud – we salsa-ed. :)

After the fireworks we went back to his house for a party and then snuck away.

And that’s when I did it!!! Oh wow – this was a big one.

I’m new at this heart-to-heart define-the-relationship stuff so I didn’t go THAT far but here’s how it went …

Me – “You make my life complicated.”

Him – “What?? I make your life complicated?” He chuckles.

Me – “Yeah – you know how you kinda had a GF when I first got back?” – he nods – “Well I kind of had a BF too.” – SHOCK on his face. I continue – “He was really nice. We had fun – he told me he loved me about a week ago – we talked about having kids – blah blah blah – and then he dumped me a couple of days later.”

Him – laughs in surprise – “He told you all of that and then broke up with you?”

Me – “Yep. He said I wasn’t into it 100% and he was right.” I give him a long sultry look ;) and then look away a little shyly. I continue – “It’s hard to be 100% into someone when you’re in Utah and into someone else.” pause –

We lock eyes for like what feels like forever and

then he kisses me.

I don’t even think I’ll see him again before I leave – tonight he’s out of town – tomorrow is my family farewell dinner and tomorrow he’s headed into the mountains for his best friend’s bday party – I was invited – but family first …

I leave Monday …

Now what?? Will he get scared off? Will we continue our long distance friendship? Will I see him again? Only time will tell … but my fingers are crossed…

And this is not related but I la-la-la-LOVE this pic – my niece and my sister-in-law (her mom.) She’s so funny – AND she’s met CC+4 and she not only likes him but asks me when she’ll see him again. Big bonus points for CC+4 – he’s GREAT with kids.

1, 2, 3… ELEVEN Petals

a petal for every passion, life is just one of them

Category Archives: My SuperDuperFantastic Dating Life (or something like that)