Longtime blog followers may remember the cruise I went on 2 years ago.  Last minute, spontaneous – it felt right.  I didn’t even KNOW about the cruise until two days before it began.  And I had to postpone my departure to Sydney for an extra week to go. It is no stretch to say it was really, really, really, really a completely unexpected turn of my heart.

And THIS (on the cruise) is where I met him.

Fast forward to a few blog posts ago.  Turning my life upside down – or right side up.  Following my heart brought me back to my best friend, it gave me the balance I was seeking, the inner peace I had lost.  And it reminded me that I am surrounded by so much love!!!  Aaaannnd that same weekend – at the MMA fight – I met him again.  The boy in the picture above or below.  ;)

Or rather I should say, he made it a point to come over and ask me if I remembered him.  (:  Of COURSE I did.  This boy isn’t really the forgettable type. (plus he can dance!!)

But then October started and I had a lot of focusing-on-self to do (which I did btw!!  I successfully did all of that stuff for the whole month!!!  YAY!!!) and so I didn’t see him again.  Well not right off anyway.  He was patient.  And when we finally DID go on a date (which I didn’t actually realize was a date – HAHA!) we hit it off.

He makes me laugh.  And he makes the world seem brighter.  And so we saw each other again.  And again.  And again.  And it’s crazy and ridiculous and amazing and beautiful that I feel the way I do about him.

We spent Thanksgiving with his family.  We dropped the L word… and I know that’s insane!!  Like seriously – I know!!!  But I also know I’ve never said it more sincerely.  I both respected and admired him BEFORE we ever decided to “date”.  And I went into this seeing both the good and not-as-good parts.  But I love it all.  All of him.

And yeah… he loves all of me!  And accepts me, skeletons and scars included.  It’s crazy and ridiculous and amazing and unbelievable that he feels the same way about me.  HAHA!  Especially since he’s LEAVING in a couple of weeks to go live in another country.  (karma sucks eh?)

But we’ve decided to throw caution to the wind.  Love is love and it feels right.

Am I a little scared?  Sure … but not really.  The odds are a bit against us.  But ultimately we’d rather have a short-lived, amazing, life-changing love that has the potential to be more than short-lived than deal with an eternal “what if?”  And so we continue.

And…for as long as our hearts guide us, we’ll walk into the unknown together, hearts smiling and inexplicably tied to one another.

I’m not going to lie – I think I have this online dating thing about figured out.  HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!  I’m kidding – kind of.  Ok the fact of it is – that I had no intention of pursuing online dating AT ALL but then I met some dudes who seemed to be pretty cool and as I engaged in contact with them I realized there were similarities in relationship patterns.  It’s quite fascinating!!!

Oh and watch for my upcoming book “Online Dating for the Dense.”  HAHAHAHAHA – just kidding – for real this time – well 90% for real.  I think I COULD prolly write a book on my studies but we’ll save that for another post.

Step Seven – A pretty big deal

Step seven is a pretty crucial step in online dating.  Yeah – that’s right – it’s a pretty big deal.  No more hiding behind words – the dude you’re talking to will now be able to HEAR you laughing at him, HEAR the cynicism in your voice, HEAR excitement – whatever – he can HEAR it.  And omgosh – don’t let me forget – umm – say hello to AWKWARD PAUSES.  (though nothing is worse than an awkward pause on skype – but that’s like level NINE so we’ll discuss that another day.)  So yeah – voice calls – a pretty big deal.

Timing is Key – calling too soon

WHY??  It’s just a phone call!!  Well because you need to make sure the timing is right.  Accurate voice call timing is crucial. Too soon and you may find yourself ending the phone call being like, “Umm alright -so yeah …” and you feel like you SHOULD say, “Talk to you soon” but you know you’re NEVER going to talk to him again so it’s a bit awkward.  PLUS if he’s all like, “This was great – I’m so glad we talked” blah blah blah – well – you feel even MORE awkward when you realize you don’t want to talk to him again.

Timing is Key – waiting too long

And then you have the other side of the fence – waiting too long before the voice call.  When this happens – you’ve been instant messaging so long that you already have an idea of how you think the other person sounds – or reacts – or just IS.  You THINK  you have an idea of their personality and then because of course you’re wrong – when you hear their voice you’re like, “omgosh – you sound like a nasal-y star trek geek who probably studies vulcan in your time off.”  WHAT DO YOU DO THEN??  Here you had these great expectations and then you talk to him and you have a mini online dating crisis.  Is this guy his voice??  Or is he his words??

Phone Calls – Golden!!

ANYWAY – if you’ve already made it through the first six steps of online dating and are prepared to take it to the next level – it’s a good sign.  Buuuutttttt – BEWARE.  Voice calls are not all they’re cracked up to be.  (haha especially if your voice cracks while talking.)  HOWEVER it’s not all gloom and doom.  Sometimes you talk to someone on the phone and are pleasantly surprised.  Suddenly you’re like, “Omgosh – I could totally see myself talking to you on a continual basis – you’re fun!”  And THAT is pretty dang cool.

Oh wait – let’s not get too excited yet.  Let’s be real – if you feel that it went SO AWESOME there’s a good chance he thought YOU sounded like a 16 year old girl who giggles too much.

Yeah – such is my life.  I bet you can’t WAIT to read about Webcams.  ;)

ANYWHO – Tonight I watched the sun set …

It was pretty.  :)

And because I heart me some seagulls :)  Here are a few of them:

(I hope you love these pics ScoMan.)

The iBirds and the iBees, Cyber Chastity Belts

My naive inner cyber child asked my grown-up real life self, “Daisy, where do cyber-babies come from?”  And I have to be honest – I was a little stumped.  Cyber babies?  Wtheck?  And why do I have an inner cyber child?

Anyway, it has been my unfortunate experience as of late, to be the target of cyber-pressure.  Say WHAT??  Yeah.  I know.  I was shocked too.  WTHECK??

Call me naive but I had no idea how similar cyber-dating was to RL dating.  IN FACT – it’s actually worse than real life dating.   Why?  Because I added the word CYBER to the front of it.  And not only does that make it SOUND worse but it also allows for a whole new breed of douchebags.  Cyber Douchebags.  And guess what?  Cyber Douchebags are SUPER douchebags.

So right here and now – I’d just like to throw it out there that I have a Cyber Chastity Belt.  And GUESS WHAT??  I don’t lower my standards just because YOU have an iCloak of anonymity which gives you more courage to cyber hit on me.  And want to know what else?   I kind of  think you’re cybersluts!  Yep.  Cybersluts.  And cowards.  Maybe I’m wrong but I have a feeling you wouldn’t DARE speak to me that way in real life.  And if I could CYBERSLAP you, I would!!!!!

HOWEVER – with that said – I think it’s completely different when two people are getting to know each other and start cyber flirting and having a little cybersexy time.  That’s normal.  And I think it’s kind of fun to have an iCrush on someone.  In fact I DO have an iCrush on someone :)  BUT!!!!! What’s NOT normal are all the dudes from UTAH fronting to be religiously devout and “ohsoMoral and wonderful” but are REALLY cyberdirty and gross!   Oh SNAP!!!  Yeah – I did  - I went there.  I said it – and I think it’s time more people started taking a stand against cyber douchebags!!  Do you really think that morals don’t translate into the digital world?

There will be no iBirds and iBees busy making iSpring happen on THIS computer with any Cybersluts.  I have cyberstandards and iMorals!!!!    And I’m not going to have a one-night cyber-fling with you just because you think the internet is a guilt-free realm.  It shouldn’t be!!!! and I DO think your computer has a virus and I DON’T want it to infect mine.

I’ve got a super-fire-wall-cyber-chastity-belt.

And just like in REAL LIFE – in my CYBERLIFE, I can’t be PRESSURED into any cyberGROSS with you.

He was handsome,
he could sing,
he la-la-la-la-la-UVed her,
and UNDOUBTEDLY he would whisk her off her feet.

As this little girl grew up her criteria changed a little bit – maybe she needed more than a fairytale.  Maybe she needed something real.

Intelligence
Motivation
Open-mindedness
Wit
(and likes dogs)

But where in the world would she ever meet Mr. Right?  And what if … oh no … what if she FOUND HIM and then discovered she wasn’t HIS Mrs. Right!?!?!

HEARTBREAK
Tears
Sad sigh

OR maybe it was fair to assume that HER Mr. Right would want the same things in HIS Mrs. Right.  So she just needed to make sure she was everything he was looking for.  :)   So she worked at being well-rounded – tried to live a full life – she knew that HER Mr. Right would be busy filling his life the best he could until he found her – and so she did the same.   And as she filled her life, her needs from a potential Mr. Right changed and became more complicated and complex.   She realized love wouldn’t be enough – she needed someone who could offer compatible and complimentary traits and talents.

Seems logical right?

Right.  It makes perfect sense to me.

So could someone please explain to me WHY in the world this is so difficult for all of the Mr. and Mrs. Wrongs to understand!?   I freaking hate dating today.   If I read someone’s profile and they are looking for a girl who is XYZ and I’m NOT XYZ – guess what??  I accept that we’re not compatible!!!   dang it – I always revert back to algebra.  BUT IT’S BECAUSE IT MAKES SENSE!!!!  But seriously – I’m a KLM looking for an EFG who is looking for a KLM.    And I’m NOT looking for an ABC who is looking for a KLM – nor am I looking for an XYZ or a DEF or IT DOESN’T EVEN MATTER – if you’re not an EFG then it DOESN’T MATTER if you are looking for a KLM.   It takes TWO to tango – and gosh darn it!!  I’m sick of all of the other letters of the alphabet today.   I don’t understand why this is so difficult to understand!!!! :(

Though if I were just blunt it’d be a heck of a lot easier to understand – but I’m trying not to be MEAN so I’m using algebraic type metaphors.

I guess it just all boils down to this: I’m annoyed.  And I know that’s MY problem but since this is my blog :) YAY!!!  I get to vent.  Please feel free to vent in the comments about whatever you like – maybe it’ll be good therapy for us all.

There are a few ways into my heart

Music is definitely one of them.  My family and dogs are another.  Imagination is the third.  And the last?  Probably humor.  I LOVE to laugh!!!

OH BUT HERE IS MY BIG NEWS!!!!!  :)  :)  :)

I’ve decided that this upcoming Valentine’s Day is going to be a VERY special day.  I have plans ALREADY!!!  I’m so excited!!!!  I’ve been thinking about it for days.  Want to know who my Valentine is this year?

Yes, it’s true.  I have a Valentine and she LOVES me.  She told me so.  Of course I need to get permission from her parental units ;) but if everything goes according to my new plan – I should be set to babysit.  AND GUESS WHAT??  I’ve already decided that no matter what boyz are in my life for Valentines – if he can’t make room for this little girl in our V-Day plans then he isn’t the guy for me.  :)

I love being an aunt.  Love, love, la-UVVVV it!!!!  My two nieces and one nephew mean the world to me.  They’re always in my heart and never far from my mind.  Whenever I’m a little down and out – I watch videos of them and it makes me smile – EVERY time.  Hearts, love, adoration. I am very, very, VERY lucky that my brothers’ children are in my life.

Anyway … I found this song over at GoldenBloggen – a kickin’ music blog.  I fell in love with it …. Glory Box by Portishead (and mom you might actually like this song despite the band name sounding a little scary. oxoxox  but you’ll like the next one even better – I think…)

And I love this one EVEN MORE!!!!  Seriously I heart The XX – HEART THEM!!!!!

If you can’t tell – I MAY have been a LITTLE crabby that night with my ghetto beach-bum rock-band SUCKING neighbors – and because of a few other things like the fact that MEN DON’T HAVE HEARTS!!!  BUT!!!  GUESS WHAT????  LAST NIGHT I WAS EVEN MORE CRABBY!!!!

MORE!!

Hard to believe – I know.  But it’s true – or at least it WAS true for the whole of a couple hours until a hot knight in damp armor (it was raining outside) rescued me from my rottenness and I got over it – temporarily.

So what could have temporarily made Daisy  MORE crabby than all of those crabby emoticons above??

Oh I don’t know … maybe the fact that North Sydney aka CommitmentPhobe aka Ultimate Douchebag aka HE’S DEAD TO ME decided to call and RIP out my heart – total gory Halloween style – and SMASH IT UP INTO A NICE MUSHY MUSHNESS and FRY IT UP LIKE A HAMBURGER.

We dated a bit, I hated him for a bit, I fell in love with him for a bit and TWO weeks ago he told me he was ready to take a chance on love (this was TWO WEEKS AGO!!)

LAST NIGHT he called to tell me HE HAS GOTTEN BACK TOGETHER WITH HIS EX from two years ago THAT HE’S ALWAYS TOLD ME HE COULDN’T STAND and THEY’RE THINKING OF MOVING IN TOGETHER!

Say WHHHAAATTT???  Two weeks he told me I WAS THE ONLY GIRL IN HIS LIFE.  Right.  Can we say DOUCHEBAG??

My mom says he’s dead to us.  So guess what??  I hope he DOESN’T rest in peace and GUESS WHAT ELSE??

This is his official Daisy Blog Obituary.

CommitmentPhobe was really cool until he turned into a weird-o freak.  Ultimate Douchebag was always a douchebag.  And although I fell in love with North Sydney and his child and although he loved me in his own twisted way too –  he only loved me as his emotional and relationship CRUTCH and it’s time to let him walk all on his own.   Good Riddance!

And if I could stick my tongue out in childish glory – I soooooo would.  But he’s “dead” to me now – and to my mom – so I think it’s time to live it up a little in Sydney before I go home.  Watch out!  I usually take the high road…

but I think it’s time to take a walk on the wild side.

in other news, I took these really cool photos that you may or may not have seen on my other blog 4, 5, 6, ELEVEN Petals.

Ugh.

Anyway – back to the one sided convo – I’m good at these….

North Sydney got a similar email.  And no – I’m not bitter AT ALL!  nope nope nope – I’m in a FABULOUS mood.  hmphf!!

Oh I bet you are just DYING to know.  *wink*  After one week of being “updated” I’ve discovered some VERY interesting things about myself.  AAANNNDDD very interesting things about the way men try and pick-up chics online … I’ve learned which techniques are OVER USED, which seem fresh, which ones are SO DUMB and which ones make me smile.  It’s quite fascinating really!!

So how do I filter?  Which guys make the cut?  How can I possibly make that decision?  It seems so … so … so… MEAN!  And judgmental!!

I mean seriously – what if this dude happens to be perfect but his game is just a little off at the moment?  HAHA!  No.   At the moment, with my time schedule, in order for Mr. Right to actually BE Mr. Right – he’s going to have to be playing up to par.  OR if he’s playing to be a bestie and isn’t interested in anything more – he’s going to have to be funny.  :)  I could use the laughs right now!!  *cheesy smile*

Anyway – please don’t take this blog the wrong way. Part of my therapy/learning is that I am supposed to try and be more discriminating with my time because I so often feel overwhelmed with social engagements or guilty for wanting to be the introvert that I am.  My therapist says it’s OK for me to prefer not to hang out with some people.  And it’s OK if I would prefer to spend more time with A than B.

And so in the world of online dating – this is a GREAT opportunity for me to practice my filtering skills.  For example – today I read an email from a dude whose profile says that he can’t stand femi-nazis or those who are pro-choice.  Ok – I respect he has opinions on the matter.  But “femi-nazis?”  OMGOSH – I’m against Nazis but femi-nazi??  What does that even mean?? Oh so he’s against women who are feminist?  Maybe he’s not secure with his manhood?  I don’t know – I just know that he and I are NOT compatible.

#1 – we’re prolly not compatible if you use inflammatory speech and state that you hate or can’t stand a specific group of people on your profile page.  Unless of course you just can’t stand people who can’t stand other people – cuz I’m with you there!!  I have no tolerance for prejudice.  But if you are intolerant of others’views – not cool.  The world is all shades of grey – if you only see two colors – we’re PROLLY not compatible.

Anyway … funny funny … I wrote back to this guy and flat out told him that I probably hit MOST of his red-flags being that I’m not super conservative, I DO believe in women’s rights and I DON’T have a fascination with guns.  I didn’t NEED to write back – but seriously – I thought it would be better to be blunt that I’m NOT his girl.

Oh heavens.  Heavens heavens heavens.  He wrote back and asked me how I could call myself a Christian.  Hmm … \

Maybe he forgot about the story where Jesus didn’t shun or hate the prostitute??

Right – and HE’S the one who is Christian …

Ok – enough out of me.  :)  I’ll keep you updated on the sweet world of online match-making as time goes on.  HAHAHAHAHA!

Hmm … I think a bullet point list ought to do.  YAY!!!  a LIST!!!  Wahoo!!!

What does this picture say about me??

1. I love ketchup
2. I don’t just LOVE ketchup but I totally <3 HEART <3 it TOO!!!  YAY!!!
3. Engineering CATASTROPHES kinda sorta bug me – kinda sorta in the way that I actually bother to take a picture of the catastrophe to post on my blog.  HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO WASH MY HANDS IN WARM WATER WHEN MY ONLY OPTIONS ARE BURNING HOT AND ICY COLD???  And no it doesn’t work to try and lightning fast swing back and forth between the two.  And even though the cold does feel pretty ok after SCORCHING your hand on BURNING HOT WATER – it doesn’t make it ok.
4. I attend the University of Sydney where these sinks are found.
5. I’m on pain pills for my back.  What? you couldn’t tell that from the picture?  OOOHHH.  Well now – look again dear friend and you MAY just see that I got ON THE WRONG TRAIN today for the first time EVER because I’m  a little YAYHAPPYDAY-DOTOODOOO space cadet.  I discovered my error when I landed in a town I couldn’t pronounce in an area I couldn’t pronounce next to a guy whose name I SURELY couldn’t pronounce.

And the best part??  The pills don’t even really work!  And thanks to the Dr. I went from a 6 on the Frowny Face scale to a whopping 8.8!!!  He said “Can you move your head like this?” and then proceeded to move my head BEFORE I COULD REACT and then YOWSERS!!  8.8 on the Frowny Scale.  The pill brought me back down to an 8 but I’d say a -0.8 reduction does NOT speak highly of the medicine.

Nighty night!!

oh and p.s. #3 has a new GF and – well – you ALL know what I won’t say right about now.  But what I WILL say is that they look really cute together!!  :)  And it appears those french fries that #3 told me I wasn’t allowed to eat because he was afraid I’d PORK OUT have landed smack dab on his hips while all that extra alkeehall he drinks now that his partner drinks with him has landed squarely (or should I say roundly?) on his belly.  HAHAHA! Karma’s a be-otch!

SNAP! I know I shouldn’t point fingers while I’m eating a bag of M&Ms – but seriously – you try being a space cadet while having EIGHT degrees of frown all up in your neck.

Violent Femmes – Blister in the Sun

omgosh – just KIDDING??  What is that?? it’s a foreign language!!  Let’s try this one instead …

photo by John Fraissinet’s under a CC license

Walking on SYDNEY SIDEWALKS in FLIP FLOPS!!!!

photo by Joseph Robertson under a CC license

No joke.  I’m not kidding you.  AT ALL.  Walking down a sidewalk in Sydney’s CBD when it’s raining and you’re wearing normal flippy floppies (or thongs for all you Aussies) is MORE SLIPPERY than walking along an icy sidewalk in heels.  And believe me – I have experience with both.

Normal sidewalks?  No problem.  The rain can’t get ME down.  But a sidewalk in the city? or in the central business district? or just anywhere non-residential?  WATCH OUT FOR YOUR LIFE!!!  If you don’t have kick-A traction on the soles of your shoes – you are going DOWN – flat on your rear.  Or if you have the powers of grace (like me hee hee) you’ll just slide around and look like you’re ice-skating for the first time.

photo by ??Tex Texin?? under a CC license.

I guess the good news is I get to feel like I’m dancing in the rain – a nice slippery smooth dance.   and really … if it weren’t for my flailing arms trying to keep balance – I’d probably be mistaken for a fairytale ballerina.

photo by ME :)

Song by Tegan and Sara “Back in your head” (Tiesto remix)