Have you heard about the latest fad diet? Sign me up!

It went a little like this…

Handsome man sporting a sexy rugged new beard who I occasionally ”catch-up” with  tells me about some

Himalayan Rock Salt Diet.

And I was like – WHATEVER – that’s hokey. And in his make-you-melt-accent of his he was like, “No seriously! I’ve been doing it and so have all of my friends.”  And he had compelling evidence (*cough – great 6 pack*) so I was like – alright I’ll think about it.

NEXT DAY:

Sam and I go buy Himalayan Rock Salt so I can start my new diet.  Yay! Hiphiphooray!

So I drank 1 liter of salt water.  Then because of the extreme thirst I found myself drinking another liter of water – and then throughout the day I drank AN ADDITIONAL liter of water.

3 liters of water equals 3 kilos or 6.6 lbs!!!!!!!

I drank 6.6 lbs today.  And would you ever guess that I also GAINED 6.6 lbs today?  Right – because the stupid DETOX didn’t DETOX and I didn’t even have to pee the whole day!!!  WTeff???  no seriously – WTEFF mother nature?? WTEFF??  When is this “cleanse” and “detox” supposed to start?  Maybe after I gain another 6.6 lbs of water weight tomorrow??

GRRRRR

Not that you’re excited to know these details but I’ll keep you updated.  So far – the himalayan rock salt miracle diet does nothing but miraculously make you turn into a whale of water.

hmphf!

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This entry was posted in And I was like ... umm ... WHAT???, Confessions, Did I just admit that?, I hate that evil scale with the hate of a thousand furies., I'll probably regret posting this, I'm a weight conscious freak, The extent of my vanity, Vanity. Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Have you heard about the latest fad diet? Sign me up!

  1. Pam says:

    Never heard of that one. But I have heard that detox treatments are supposed to be good for you.

  2. Kyra says:

    Yikes, I don’t think I could manage to drink that much salt water. I start gagging when just rinsing my mouth with salt water after a dentist visit.

  3. ScoMan says:

    He’s a Himalayan Rock Salt salesman! It’s all a scam! That’s what they do! They get all buff and earn your trust and then convince you to buy Himalayan Rock Salt! And then you put on the water weight and right when you go to chase them down to get your money back THAT’S when you really need to pee, and they get away.

    It happened to a friend of a friend of mine.

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